Its Six o'Clock on a Monday night and all of the important people are in Jerrabombera.
Specifically, they are at the abode of the recently returned High Commissioner to North Korea, BLACK DOG.

The threat of rain was in the air. CENTREFOLD, who has been previously outed as a fair weather hasher, is visibly nervous.

The GM gathers the pack together, the pack is visibly larger as several hashers have survived another Xmas. Lots of talk and chatter keep the GM on her toes and the “Chalk talk” from GREENFINGER just goes on forever. The “Gin Sluts” are a giggling, jabbering mess over in the corner, might not be a good idea to have them drive the drink stop vehicle. Just saying.

The runners leave and are subjected to a number of loops which consistently bring them back to the walkers pack. Up we go, up up the Jerrabombera hill and around and down again. Until after a short sojourn through the burbs we stumble on the gin sozzled waitresses at the drink stop.

A lovely choice of ginger and lemonade or sherry and lemonade made for really nice refreshments to wash the chippies down.

Back at the consulate, the GM finally had enough of the chatterers and down downed them, not once but Twice. BLACK DOG hasn’t changed one bit and can still be heard in the background of any social gathering. In the suburb like the annoying buzz of a hornets nest.

CRAFT was welcomed, TAINTED LOVE was welcomed back.

FLUID MOVEMENT described the trail as “ confusing, scenic and bushy” and got a “wide on” when confronted by a shirtless GERBILS. TAINTED LOVE described a walkers trail which didn’t resemble the one I walked on. Apparently no trees, hills, roots or shiggy.

We sang the hare song and WEATHERMAN didn’t disappoint with another travesty of poetry.
GERBILS was charged for losing the ice.
BLACKDOG for hooning
CAPT PUGWASH was brought into the circle to officially recognise his notoriety in Masterbatemans bay and specifically for being arrested by the rozzers for public nudity. As a retort, he sung the MBHHH song
SCARLETT was charged for doing a runny poo.
GREASENIPPLE was charged for smiling

The pack was astounded to learn that ENERGISER is pregnant AND when she takes her false teeth out her knickers fall down!!!! Yep, you heard it first right here in hash notes

SCARLETT was given the BIG PRICK for shortcutting
FRB went to CENTREFOLD (Now that doesn’t happen everyday)
COUNT HER FEIT 601 runs, McTRASH 200 runs AND,
SUELLEN has been seen to commence a Capital Hash run 1000 times
Bloody good effort SUELLEN. In accordance with current GMs policy, your inscribed mug will be presented eventually, along with your commemorative sash, keepsake coin, limited edition tee shirt, salt and pepper shakers and complimentary life membership of the Duffy bowls club.

All in all another great hash night (is there any other) score 7 out of minus 22 potatoes

As usual, I make no apologies for blatantly misrepresenting the truth. It's how I won my Pulitzers.